London Wetland Centre

Websites:
http://www.wwt.org.uk/visit/wetlandcentre
http://www.londonwetlandcentre.co.uk

I've wanted to visit the London Wetland Centre for years. It's a massive expanse of "wetland" conservation area located next to the river Thames in west London. Today ABJ and I finally gave it a visit.

Arriving at about 2pm we bought our £6 student tickets at the entrance and set off into the courtyard. Immediately we were greeted by a friendly woman who orientated us on the map and explained the different areas of the wetland. There are two main sides to the site: one has endangered species and one does not.

We began with the endangered species side. This started with "World Wetlands" and was home to wetlands and birds from all around the world. The wetlands included Asian rice paddies, North American pine forests, Islands, Arctic Tundra etc. The different areas are fenced off from each other so the birds can't go between them (presumably the birds wings are clipped!).

The first stop, Artic Tundra, was one of the liveliest wetlands because there were so many different types of birds and no fence to keep them off the paths. The ducks and birds all squarked and flapped their wings at each other and at us. We watched different types of birds sticking together in close groups - each group trying to dominate the others.
Dotted throughout the center there were also lots of bird-photographers with enormous zoom lenses:The birds in the centre included an impressive variety of species. There were "red-breasted geese", "black swans", "chiloe wigeons" and hundreds of others I can't remember the names of:
I can identify this one... a Black Swan:Some "Red-crested Pochards":The wetlands certainly lived up to their name. There were paths passing between the rushes and lakes. The place was very well sign-posted and each area had a different name and welcoming illustrations:Dotted around the centre were also lots of hides. From inside you could watch the birds without them knowing:There were lots of signs saying "Please keep quiet in the hides. Birds have ears too." ABJ and I didn't have any binoculars so the hides unfortunately didn't offer us the chance to get spectacularly close to any of the birds.

We spent a long time enjoying the different areas, the hides and the birds before eventually returning to the courtyard where we began.

Here we tried out the "Discovery centre" which, along with an informative display in one of the hides, educated us about what a wetland is and why they're important. The definition of a wetland is very wide (e.g it includes the Thames estuary as well as coral reefs) but an important thing, apparently, is that the water is less than 6ft deep. The Discovery centre had a fun walk-through display in which you walked through different environments and had to decide if they counted as wetlands (e.g. a coral reef, a flooded forest etc). Unsurprisingly perhaps most of the environments were wetlands.

After the walk-through there was a very fun display about what wetlands do and why they're important. The display was set up like an old-fashioned fairground with games and shows. To give you an idea there was one game called "Shoot your poo":
The aim of the game was to get small plastic balls (i.e. your poo) into holes by firing them through air guns. This illustrated the powerful way in which wetlands can process waste.

Another game involves firing water guns into pipes to illustrate that life needs water. There was a game whose opening premise was "You're a planning officer". Not very inspiring but it made a good point. You had to decide how to build flood defences and where to build houses on a scaled down model. The model had a mountain at one end and a flood plain at the other and periodically the mountain would be heavily rained on and a wall of water would deluge the flood plains. There were lego bricks available to build defences to save the foam houses. Very eduational.

After ABJ thought I'd had enough of the games we continued on our way to the other side of the centre - the non-endangered species side. This was good although less spectacular - mainly because it seemed the birds on this side didn't have their wings clipped (since they were non-endangered). That meant the birds had flown away and a lot fewer were on display in the lakes and marshes.

We journeyed on and visited a few more hides, watched a few birds flying around, watched a few jumbo jets flying overhead towards Heathrow airport. Dusk fell and we were tired from all our walking. We visited the gift shop and bought a few things to support the centre. To get back home we decided to take the number 283 bus, a.k.a "the Duck Bus". This left conveniently from a stop at the centre and off we went.

Summary: Well worth a visit. The birds at the centre change at different times of the year so it's worth going again during a different season.

The list (number five)

Here's an updated list with a few items crossed-out and a few added:

• Tour round Buckingham Palace
• Go up the BT Tower for the view
  
• Cycle around Richmond park
• Sneak into the fancy hotels - Hilton, Savoy etc
• Go to all the museums in London
• Go to all the major art museums in London
  
• Have a drink in the ice-bar off Regent Street
• Do the sing-along sound of music at the Prince Charles cinema
  
• Watch a film at the Electric cinema in Notting Hill
• Watch a film at a Leicester Square cinema
• Watch an IMAX film near Waterloo
• Go to a casino
• Explore the new O2 centre at the Millennium Dome
• Tour round the BBC TV centre and BBC Broadcasting House
• Watch a live, well-attended debate in Parliament (e.g. Prime Ministers questions)
• Go out for an artsy night out in the east-end.
• Shop at Petticoat Lane market
• Go on the rides at the London dungeons
• Sit in on a Sotheby's auction
• Eat at a traditional pie 'n' mash shop
• Tour round Lord's cricket ground
• Tour round Wembley stadium
• Go to the London wetland centre
• Visit Chelsea Physic Garden
• Get into London fashion week
• Tour around City Hall
• Tour around Tower Bridge
• Go to the tennis at Wimbledon
• See some plays
• Ride home in a rickshaw
• Eat at some famous restaurants
• Visit the hidden-away nature reserve behind St. Pancras station
• Visit a big mosque, big synagogue, other big places of worship
  
• Use an "isolation tank" near London Bridge
• Get a free Hare Krishna vegetarian meal
• Go to the the Jazz Cafe in Camden
• Go to some jazz club I've heard about in Soho
• Eat a meal in one of the touristy Leicester square steak houses
• Tour around Battersea power station
• Explore Heathrow Terminal 5
• Tour round Albert Hall and Albert Memorial
• Tour round Chiswick Fuller's brewery
• Eat at the restaurant at the top of Tate Modern
• Visit an exhibition at Earls Court and Kensington Olympia
• Visit a city farm
• Tour round Thames barrier

The London Dungeon

Website: http://www.thedungeons.com

Today I visited the London Dungeon, one of the most touristy places in London. Tucked away under London Bridge station the dungeons are always very busy with long queues of visitors waiting on the pavement outside.

I arrived at the start of the extraordinarily long "buy your ticket on the day" queue at about 12.30pm. I finally finished my visit to the dungeons at 3.40pm. It was quite a visit I'm sure you'll agree... until I tell you that out of that 3 hours 40 minutes I spent 2 hours queueing. That is, from the time I joined the back of the queue (out on the street, in the rain) to the time I joined a tour group that actually set off around the dungeons was 2 hours. 2 hours of my life I'll never get back...
In the queue I was sandwiched behind a large group of twenty-somethings and in front of a family. When the family joined the queue the father said "When we went to York dungeon the queue was this long and only took 20 minutes." I didn't realise dungeons were so universally popular.

The family consisted of two nice parents and four horrible savage children. The kids spent their time shaking wet umbrellas on each other, throwing food on the pavement, repeatedly spitting on the ground and, of course, shoving into me. Just great. I waited quietly in the rain and had so much time to fill that I managed to listen to the whole of the Dark Side of the Moon album. I watched as the family nipped off for hot drinks at Starbucks and the twenty-somethings nipped off to Pret for sandwiches and hot stinking croissants.

Given this hellish queuing I was looking forward to getting past the ticket desk and setting off on the trip. I guess I was naive. Before buying my ticket I had a photo of me taken posing in stocks. I then bought a student ticket for £18.95 and sped off into the dungeons. Or so I thought. First stop was an awkward misunderstanding with a few of the twenty-somethings ahead of me. They were waiting past the ticket desk for some friends who'd gone to the toilet and I stood in their midst for about thirty seconds. I finally figured out why they were waiting and set off to the dungeons. Or so I thought. Next stop was another queue that wound through a weirdly decorated corridor. There were rats on display, entrails, tinned rat etc. I heard two people separately comment "Oh I see! It's death by queuing!".

Finally we squirmed past an important door and were shuttered off into a tour group. An actor dressed in a cloak welcomed us to "The Crypt" and sent us off into "The Labyrinth of the Lost". During his introduction he would talk to one side of the group and then SUDDENLY spin round to the other side and shout his next piece of dialogue to the person he thought was most likely to have a heart attack.

The labyrinth was fun since it was a hall of mirrors and (at last!) we were free to wander (not in a queue) through it. We all made it through to the other side and were greated by a woman who told us we all had the plague and should go to the doctor. She led us through some more spooky corridors and into an "autopsy room". An actor dressed as a doctor was hiding behind the autopsy table and JUMPED OUT at us. He then plucked out a member of the group and analysed them in front of us all, telling us what he'd be like if he had the plague. We then left the doctor and visited "Newgate Gaol" where we were ushered into a court room. Three members of the group were made to stand in the dock and were accused of committing crimes. As they walked up to the dock we were encouraged to "booooooo".

The first was a 10 year old boy called Oliver accussed of running around Covent Garden pinching ladies bottoms.
Verdict: Innocent.

The second was a woman called Lucy who was accussed of urinating into water wells.
Verdict: Guilty.

The third was a man who said he was from Beligum.
Immediate Verdict: GUILTY.

We then left and went on the "Traitor: Boat Ride to Hell". This was billed as amazingly exciting. I joined a boat and we set off. I don't know what I was expecting but what we got was very disappointing. There were no people jumping out at us, no scary noises, no rapids... not much in fact. The whole trip was completed slowly, almost like a formal ballet, in complete darkness. When it was over we were ushered out and into Sweeney Todd's barber shop. We sat in barber's chairs and, once again, all the lights went out. A recorded voice of Sweeney Todd spoke in our ears and then we were jerked back in our chairs. Was that it!? Just compare that to the advertising poster:
We then left and went to the Jack the Ripper part of the dungeons. We saw a few dead, mutilated bodies of prostitutes (pretty odd entertainment really) and then a video about "Who was Jack the Ripper?". This lacked any explanatory power and was basically a series of photos of Victorian men with a voice-over saying "Or was it Colonel _____, or was it physician _____". We were then ushered out and into a mock pub. A woman behind the bar told us it was the ten year anniversary of the ripper murders. We were supposed to get more and more scared as items on the bar began to move of their own accord and then SUDDENLY the lights go OUT and a strobe light shows JACK THE RIPPER trying to slash a group member near the front of the bar! Now I have to admit that was pretty good. He appeared suddenly in a hat and cape with a blast of air and then suddenly was GONE!

We then "learnt" about the Great Fire of London before going on the ride "Extremis: Drop Ride to Doom". We sat in two rows of seats in a room. A restraining bar came down upon us, the lights went out and the seats were raised up. At the top we looked out upon a row of hangman nooses and a judge pronounced that we were due to be hanged. The hangman pulled the lever and SUDDENLY we DROPPED DOWN. And... err... well, that was it.

We were let out and sent into the photo preview room. As always the photos of me were terrible and I didn't want to spend the enormous fees to buy them. The tour ended in the gift shop: "The best Halloween shop in London". It did seem pretty good. There was a variety of Halloween costumes available:Overall I felt the London Dungeons were overpriced and disappointing. My desire to visit them, I reflected, was due to their extensive advertising that makes the rides look exciting. The rides were lacklustre and plain - not "scary" or "terrifying":
As an attraction they clearly save a lot of electricity money by keeping the lights out for most of the time. The high visitor turnover meant that visitors were ushered through each part too quickly. At various points the actors call the tour group "scum" and, worst of all, because I was visiting alone, I was variously called "a suicider" and "billy no-mates". And, to rub salt into the wound, I was paying loads of money for the experience!

Summary: Not worth it.

Tower Bridge

Website: http://www.towerbridge.org.uk

I've tried twice to visit Tower Bridge but each time something has gone wrong. I finally managed it today.

At about 2pm I bought my £4.50 student ticket from the ticket office in the north tower. I passed through the security metal detector and x-ray machine and into the waiting lift. We waited for the lift to get full wall-to-wall and then ascended to the top of the tower. A woman gave us an informative welcome message which was timed to last exactly as long as the lift journey and then we all exited into a video room at the top of the tower. There were good views:I watched a short film about why the bridge was built and the competition for the best design. It was built to easy road traffic in the east of London but also had to allow ships to pass. There were loads of wild and wacky designs - including bridges that slid back and forth across the river, or bridges that snake around the ships in complicated shapes. After fierce scrutiny the current hinged design was chosen. It was built from Scottish steel with 2 million rivets and opened at last in 1894. It was deliberately designed to look old-fashioned to fit in with the Tower of London nearby.

After the video room we got to walk out on the walkway that connects the top of the towers. I didn't know this was a walkway until today (I'd thought it was just for decoration). This was great and I was impressed by the views over the river. The walkway was enclosed but there were windows that we could take photos through:
There were information boards too where I learnt a lot about the bridge. The bridge has appeared in a few adverts:
A plane flew through the bridge:
After World War II there was a suggestion to encase the bridge in glass to provide living space and offices etc:After the walkways I went down the south tower to watch another video about how the bridge was built. I learnt that in World War II the Germans deliberately tried not to bomb the bridge because it was a good landmark for their bombing approaches into London.

I got the lift down the tower and we were told to "Follow the blue line" to the engine rooms:
The engine rooms were the final stop of the tour but possibly the best bit. We learnt in detail about the machinery that powers the raising and lowering of the bridge. We got to walk around the steam-powered machines (which have now been replaced by electric power) and understand how all the stages fit together. I found it fascinating to see how complicated it all was and how clever the engineers must have been to design it.

The last part was the "Engineering gallery" with a number of hands-on demonstrations about physics and engineering principles applied to small models of the bridge. One young boy (who didn't work there but was just a visitor like me!) enthusiastically demonstrated one to me. He got me to sit on a chair which he raised off the ground by turning a geared wheel for a long time. Then, with my feet dangling, he pressed a button and my weight applied hydraulic pressure to an oily liquid which came shooting out of a pipe nearby. This is the same principle as the massive "accumulators" used to store power which is then used to work pistons that raise the bridge:
These demonstrations were much better than the hands-on stuff in science museums because you could see the ideas had been harnessed and applied to solve a problem. In museums the demonstations are often just pointless mechanisms that show the principle working in a sterile way. It was more interesting here because it was applied to something.

We ended in a gift shop with hundreds of little models of the bridge available to buy.

Summary: Surprisingly fun and interesting. The videos brought the issues to life and the demonstrations and information boards were clear and interesting.

A long absence

For the last month or so I've been too busy to do any local tourist trips. Whether it was moving house, going to Italy, doing DIY or just doing fun non-touristy things on the weekends I've been neglecting the local tourist list. That is, until today...

See some plays: Rain Man

Websites:
http://www.rainmanonstage.com
http://www.apollo-theatre.co.uk

Last night ABJ and I took a spur of the moment trip to the Apollo theatre to see Rain Man. We bought two £16 tickets for seats in the Balcony. They were so high up that we had to exit the theatre and enter a staircase leading up from the street! We ended up with a view all the way down through the theatre to the stage:
The play starred Josh Hartnett as Charlie (a slick car saleman who - at the start - is only after money) and Adam Godley as Raymond (Charlie's autistic older brother).
The story is already a Hollywood film but this version had been "reimagined for the stage". It was good. In fact, I'd forgotten how enjoyable theatre plays can be - much more enjoyable than musicals... There were jokes and thought-provoking moments. The interval curtain was pretty cool too:
Summary: I'll certainly be going to "see some plays" more often.

Battersea Power Station

Website: http://www.batterseapowerstation.com

Today I went along with ML and VB to Battersea Power Station. This former coal-fired power station has been disused since 1983 and its iconic building has been slowly decaying ever since. Located next to Battersea park its four tall chimney stacks are a famous part of the London skyline. There's an urban regeneration project which plans to transform the site into a huge entertainment complex with cinemas, bars, restaurants etc. Before that happens, however, the site has been opened, by popular demand and for a limited time only, to the public.

We arrived at about 1pm on our bikes and a steward told us where to lock them - a green wire fence that seemed deliberately designed to ensure the bike frame was kept at an unlockable distance from it. Finally, with grunts and heaves and two locks between three bikes, we managed to cram them in securely.

Pausing for a quick look at the dominating architecture we then entered a small white building at the edge of the power station grounds. This was an exhibition about the regeneration project which we wandered around:There had been a regeneration project before funded by the then Alton Towers chairman which aimed to set up an indoor theme park. Unfortunately this ran out of money and left the building with no roof and no western wall.

The current regeneration project involves making an environmentally friendly greenhouse-like complex next to the power station:
The old building would be restored and would house restaurants and cafes etc. Judging from the scale model on display the new building (with a huge chimney roof) will dominate the site. It reminded us of the Millennium dome project.

After the exhibit we had to sign disclaimer forms before we could set off. These made the trip sound incredibly exciting - there was talk of machinery and rough terrain, dirt and dust everywhere, rubble etc. We happily signed away all liability and then set off for the site. We handed in our disclaimer forms at desk outside and were given a free bottle of water. Considering that the whole trip was free as well this made us all very happy.

We now got better views of the power station as we approached it from across the derelict site. Everyone had their cameras out and was snapping away. The people with zoom lenses and fancy cameras would labouriously set up their shots only to have someone else carelessly walk in front of them.

We arrived at the power station and followed the fenced-in route. All the time we were anticipating that we'd get to go inside and climb up and down ladders and gantries, pull levers, press buttons etc. Unfortunately the best we got to do was peer into the empty decaying power station halls from behind a fence at the outer wall. We peered into one hall and saw the chunks of wood and masonry scattered around:We then walked around the back and looked in at another hall. It looked like a sad ruin with its roof ripped off and pigeons living amongst the girders.Both VB and I spent a lot of time taking arty pictures:
One of the reasons Battersea power station is so famous is that it appeared on the cover of the Pink Floyd album Animals. During the photo shoot they tethered a huge inflatable pig to the power station which apparently broke loose and ended up crashing somewhere in Kent. (See here for more information and photos.)

Summary: Good free fun but a little disappointing we couldn't climb around inside.

Buckingham Palace

Website: http://www.royal.gov.uk

Today I went on a tour around the State Rooms of Buckingham Palace. The palace is only open at certain times of the year and have intended to visit it ever since I first moved to London over 5 years ago!

I'd booked my £14 student ticket a few days earlier for a slot at 2pm today. I arrived and had to work hard to navigate the hordes of tourists and find the Buckingham Palace Shop where I could pick up my ticket. I then took my ticket to the Visitor Entrance at 1.45pm in time for my 2pm slot. There were lots of young helpful "wardens" dressed in smart uniforms to help the clueless tourists. We were corralled in a holding area while we waited for the "airport style security area" to empty ahead.
We finally were let through and filed slowly through the metal detectors and bag scanners. After that we snaked through to a tent to pick up our complementary audio guide. I chose the English language one, slung it around my neck, pressed the green PLAY button and set off.

As the stirring introductory music played I stepped up the red carpet and entered the Palace. I usually hate audio guides but have to admit that the one used at Buckingham Palace was really good. It provided options to select what to hear about, the information was interesting and not too lengthy and it always said things like "If you would like to then you might consider moving to the next room..." rather than the usual "Next we have...".

We began by seeing the quadrangle which is a huge open square just behind the front of the Palace. It's used for parades and for greeting heads of state. They enter the vast quadrangle through a small archway at the front and, standing right in front of them, is the formal entrance to the Palace - an imposing multi-columned entranceway.

Just inside the formal entrance is the Entrance Hall which is a large impressive room with rich red carpets, immense columns and gold decoration everywhere. From here we climbed a staircase with an intricate bronze balustrade which was made a long time ago and, in modern day money, would cost £210,000 (that's just for the balustrade alone!).

We then entered the Guards Room and the Throne Room. All the interiors were designed by architect John Nash and he must have been good. The rooms are supposed to impress visiting heads of state and diplomats and they certainly meet that goal. Everywhere is rich wallpaper, carpets, silk, golden designs, complex mouldings, vast chandeliers etc etc. The Throne Room held the coronation thrones of the Queen and Prince Philip as well as a few coronation thrones from previous monarchs. During my visit I discovered that asking questions to the older "wardens" got a better answer to my question than asking the younger ones.

Next stop was the Picture Gallery - a narrow 50ft long room with huge paintings hanging on the walls. This led to another narrow room with curved, etched skylights in the roof. Apparently there was a small fire recently that led to three of these skylights being smashed. Although they could have been replaced by modern glass makers the original workers were thoughful enough to have made 4 spare windows. These were found in the Palace carefully crated up in a store room. They were installed after waiting 100 years.

We passed a display of photos of the Queen with visiting heads of state and were then led to the Ball Room. This was one of the most impressive rooms and is where the Queen hosts state dinners for visiting heads of state. It's apparently one of the largest rooms in London and luckily had a seating area where the tourists could rest. I took a seat there amongst the prostrate visitors. It was like sitting in a battle-field hospital surrounded by the dead and the dying.

In the center of the room is a huge U-shaped table that can seat around 200 people. The Queen sits at the centre of the U with her guests on either arm ahead of her. The chinaware and silverware are layed out days in advanced and carefully measured onto the tablecloth - to ensure they're all in a perfect line when you look down the table. Each place has a number of different glasses - for red wine, white wine, port, champagne etc. I've eaten in places where they put a lot of time into the presentation I've noticed that the food is always a bit of a let down. I hope the food they serve up in the state banquets is tasty! Next was a little video display about the behind-the-scenes preparation for the banquets. All the plates etc are washed by hand because they're too valuable to entrust to a dishwashing machine.

The next few rooms all overlook the gardens at the rear of the Palace. They were differently themed and contained a variety of very fancy furniture. There was a table which once belonged to Napolean and is made of one huge disc of porclein which, by firing and gilding, was decorated with very intricate artwork that took 6 years to complete! One of the most valuable pieces in the collection was a writing desk which had layer-upon-layer of inlayed wood.

We then travelled downstairs again and into a long corridor with marble statues on display. By far the most impressive was a huge 2 metre tall statue of the gods Mars and Venus sculpted from a single block of marble.

The tour finally finished at the rear of the Palace, exiting onto the Garden Terrace. Here we returned our audio guides and were allowed to take photos once again. Immediately all the tourists whipped out their cameras and began snapping the rear-end of the Palace:
The tourists also got to visit a gift shop which they thrived in:I should admit that I bought some chocolates there too... There was a nice walk out through the gardens:
Summary: An impressive place to visit. The rooms, the decoration and the expensive furniture are all well worth seeing.